New Law in Kentucky Makes Complimenting Police Officers a Crime

“Hey, looking good officer, thanks for protecting us!” said a citizen to a police officer as he walked by. The man was subsequently approached calmly by the officer, who spoke in dismissive tones, “okay, boss, okay, calm down,” knowing he had the law behind him, and, not needing to interpret the situation further, pushed the vocal citizen to the ground, handcuffed them, and took them away. “It’s safer than relying on people being human beings,” said one legislator. “If we could make cops infallible robots, we definitely would, but in the meantime, we will just make the laws treat them as robots that can not make rational decisions of behave as humans. This will keep the streets safe from anyone with any kind of opinion or stray thought about police, and give the police the ultimate authority to decide what people can say and do in their presence, which of course is American to the core. Interpretation, AS WE ALL KNOW, is the most dangerous enemy in America right now. Take that how you will. Best to– when in doubt- just start stomping faces. Conversation is for communists.”

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