Will you be lucky enough to land one of the coveted initial spots? Because just like Google did for the lauded Gmail launch, word has it there will be a first round of initial invitations to the crème de la crème of bottom feeders.
Some people are even getting reserved accounts timed to be waiting for them for when they get out of prison for their executive, white collar crimes and need to step into a new source of income. Which clearly the platform will mainly be designed to surely be, perhaps even being a paid subscription service? But no doubt fitting the Trump M.O. of preying on the poor spiritually indigent population of our forsaken nation desperately needing actual help. Will you be one of the first to grab a spot? Perhaps a premium account, where you can sell your news hour? Your pillows? Or just pillow cases that come with the eye holes already cut out? What keeps the other paying users paying, angry, and willing to hate who you want them to hate?
Stick around, dear Patriot-Against-The-Nation, cause before it inevitably collapses in scandal with everyone’s private information leaked for all to see, this new social media spot is sure to be HOT HOT HOT.